Opinions

Alright so just gonna ask for some advice. I have a girlfriend at the moment, but my ex is still in my circle of friends. I will usually avoid the shit out of her. The reason I do this is for the following reasons: When we dated she would be awesome 1 on 1. Whenever she had one other friend or 10 around she'd turn into a huge bitch and completely ignore me, or when I talked to her she'd always snap at me. Then she'd always run around and pretend to hit on other guys. Once I was behind her and I put my arms around her and she didn't acknowledge me and pretty much just laughed her way out and moved away. Another time I was doing homework later at night and she told all her friends that I was intentionally trying to keep her awake. Later she told me she wanted to break up because I didn't pay enough attention to her. The breakup was mutual, but she told everyone that she dumped me on my ass, even get approached by former classmates saying "Oh man heard you were dumped". For these reasons and a few more that I don't care to list I really don't like her.

So I don't attend things shes at, not because I'm not over her, its because I don't like her at all, and I can't stand seeing her. My friends tell me that "I'm letting her win" and that I'm making them choose between us. Personally I'm happiest not seeing her and being with my girlfriend. I don't want to pretend to enjoy a poker night with her there. Not sure if this makes sense, is it the right thing to just do this? I know its not. I wouldn't want to go to a party with a former bully for example, so I'm viewing this in a same light. This is stopping me from having some fun, but I have no interest in rekindling a friendship. In a perfect world I would approach her and try to become comfortable with our past, but I can't see either of us acting ourselves in such a conversation

No reason to be involved with her and you have good reasons to avoid her, so continuing to do what it is you're doing sounds good.

Your friends will make their own choice based on what you need to do for yourself. I don't like the amount of hearsay your friends are paying mind to (the stuff about you getting dumped when it wasn't the case, the two-faced behaviors). If it is so overwhelming that she is manipulating them, then let them subject themselves to it and believe that there's a win/lose "game" going on. Whether or not they see through it isn't of consequence: you're over this shit, you don't need it and you've made the decision to put up a fence.

If they don't like it, that's sort of tough shit.

Oh wow that's so dishonest. Yeah I say avoiding her to an extent makes sense...time you spend around her could potentially be time you spend doing something better.

just do what ever you want and just ignore her i would say. if your friends are still friends with her it sounds kinda of a hinderance on your part if you have to choose not to hang out with your friends because shes there. idk. these situations are never fun.